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About the Author

I’m Brittany Ann, a 29-year-old writer, blog reader, and survivor of childhood domestic violence and sexual abuse. Although this abuse was endured from both parents, I have a particular focus on relating with other MDSA (mother-daughter sexual abuse) survivors. This is largely due to awareness of this very unpublished issue and its aftermath.

As all of us who have suffered domestic violence and/or sexual abuse, I am seeking to uncover how a “victim” becomes a “survivor.” My cherished answer at this point in the journey is to live for those invigorating moments that may seem few and far between.

I’ve been working as an adult to heal for many years. However, never more so than 2010 onward after the arrival of my daughter. It became impossible to pardon the abusers or set the abuse aside when a new life was in my hands; when I cared for a child first-hand.

I find many unanticipated challenges as a survivor; some swift and overwhelming. My goal is to weather those challenges in the shaky, yet peaceful aftermath of ending contact with both of my parents- the abusers. All the while, my greatest hope is to write and communicate with other survivors as we continue this journey to heal, little by very little.

I can be emailed at: butterflyclosures@gmail.com with anonymous questions or suggestions.

The information contained on this website is of research and opinion of its author.

I am not a qualified professional, but a fellow survivor.

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8 Comments
  1. It’s extremely difficult to find information about mother-daughter sexual abuse. It was one of the first things I blurted out to my present therapist just to see what her reaction would be.

    I think you are very brave by confronting this in your blog. I haven’t written about it in my own blog yet because of the shame and plain weirdness (in my mind) I feel.

    Thank you for being so brave.

    Lisa

    • Lisa,

      I’m am very sorry you had to endure MDSA as well. As you have said, it is indeed extremely difficult to find information as well as fellow survivors.

      Thank you for sharing this, I know it is a terribly difficult thing to talk about. May we find peace as we find we are not alone. I have you listed on my blogroll, as I recently found your blog through a couple of others I have been following.

      I had to check for my therapist’s reaction as well, before I became remotely interested in working with her. I expected her to have no knowledge and to make me feel less alone or be skeptical of it.

      Thank you for your compliment. You are very brave yourself to share here. I hope to address feelings and issues surrounding MDSA, both concerning survivors and family/friends. Feel free to let me know if anything in particular is weighing on your mind and I can address it here, with or without referencing.

      Take good care, and thank you for sharing your blog as well.

  2. Hi,

    I too am a survivor of mother-daughter sexual abuse. I have some blog friends that are mdsa survivors as well and find a great deal of healing from interacting with them as well. Some of my best friends are as well and they understand me in a way no one else ever can.

    I wanted to add that I have a page of healing resources for mdsa survivors on my blog:

    http://kate1975.wordpress.com/2009/08/02/mother-daughter-sexual-abuse-links/

    I also have some links there to other women bloggers who are mdsa survivors. I added a blog link to you as well, if you want it removed, let me know. It’s hard to find them in a search, but I have wandered onto several just by accident. A couple I found in wordpress searches. A few found me.

    Good and healing thoughts to you.

    Kate

  3. Kate,

    I really want to thank you for saying hello and linking to your blog and its extensive resources. It is comforting to hear from another MDSA survivor, and helpful to find more such blog friends.

    It’s wonderful that some of your best friends can relate and understand you so well. I haven’t found this yet, but I know there are other women out there.

    I appreciate you adding me to your blog links. I will add you to my blogroll soon as well. Your resources are wonderful, and will help us all find others who relate.

    Take care, and I look forward to reading more of your blog.

    • Hi,

      You’re welcome. The purpose of all the healing resource pages I created are for survivors to use in healing. So it is wonderful to me when they are used.

      I hope you can check out some of the mdsa survivor blogs listed as you find others who can really relate to you and who you will be able to relate to. Also my blogroll has some great blogs by survivors who are doing some great writing and great healing work. I know that there are lots of survivors out there in the blog world who are worth getting to know.

      Good and healing thoughts to you.

      Kate

  4. Rachel permalink

    My step daughter is currently being sexually abused by her mother. She told her father, a counselor and also teachers. Everyone reported it to social services and today she is still in a 50/50 custody arrangement in Colorado. Her mother that is allegedly doing these acts is a Licensed psychotherapist in the State of Colorado so knowing the system, she said my husband was “coaching” our daughter to say those things. The worst part is, she also had a sexual relationship with her step-son when he was 13 and she was 27 and her son told those very people that she was having sex in front of him with at least 8 different men.
    Although there are three different children all crying out that they are being sexually abused, the state will not consider that it is true and has returned the two younger biological children back to her care without supervision. The night our daughter was told that she was going to be returned to her mother without supervision because the investigation was closed, she physically started vomitting.
    If anyone has any resources that we may be able to use to get help, we would appreciate it very much.

    I myself have not dealt with abuse like this but watching my step daughter who is 7 years old endure this is devastating. I wish all of you healing and peace.

    Rachel

  5. I am so thankful I happened upon your website just now for I am a much older woman who was abused by her mother as an infant until a pre-teen or older (can’t really remember for sure) and am just now starting to work on this issue with a therapist. I have not been able to find anything about such abuse. Did see on amazon there is a book called The Last Secret but the selling price is just too high to buy it.

    Just wanted to say hello and God bless you. I look forward to devouring what you have to share.

  6. Emma permalink

    I know your pain, it is a unforgivable act… It was my father that was the primary abuser, my mother turned a blind eye… So she was to blame as well

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